I’ve been seeing the modifier “quiet/ly” showing up a lot recently. I first remember seeing it with the concept of “quiet quitting,” where disheartened employees weren’t officially leaving their jobs, but they weren’t engaged or productive.
Lately, though, it’s been everywhere:
- “Netflix quietly cancels show”
- “Is China quietly winning the AI arms race?”
- “Five habits that quietly ruin good photos”
It’s been bugging me, and I think there are a few reasons for it.
For one thing, it feels artificial. It’s like those AI-generated essays that have a recognizable cadence designed to make everything sound Very Profound. What is the purpose of adding the word “quiet/ly”? Does it improve the meaning of the sentence?
But beyond that, there’s something that bothers me on a personal level: “quietly” implies a disconnect between action and impact. It seems like a denigration of both intention and accountability.
I use “implies” and “seems like” because I’m aware that the itchiness I feel is projection. There’s nothing inherently wrong with doing something quietly. In fact, I used to enjoy acting under the radar: helping people in subtle, gentle ways that didn’t trigger defensiveness or conflict.
I can’t do that anymore — at least, not entirely. I can still be gently encouraging, but it’s no longer enough.
I need to speak up.
I need to stand for what I believe in — clearly, publicly, and with conviction.
∾*∾*∾*∾*∾
It hasn’t always been easy. I used to be afraid not just of what others might think, but of personal danger. With my Jewish heritage, I was raised on stories on my great-grandmother being the only surviving child of 12, with the others being murdered in the Holocaust. At a family gathering in ‘90, the older generation swapped memories of hiding in barns from Cossacks.
Standing up and being noticed can be dangerous.
Just look at what was done to Martin Luther King, Jr. and Yitzhak Rabin and Alex Pretti.
And yet, my mother taught me that the most effective way to get over fear was to accept the worst possible scenario. Once you make your peace with the fact that yes, it could happen, then it no longer has the same type of power over you.
What am I willing to die for?
That’s not a flippant question. Regardless of how much our society may try to avoid it, the truth is that everyone dies. Once I understood that on a gut level, it became much easier for me to relax my need to “stay safe” because I could see safety as the illusion it is.
And yes: I said easier. It’s still not always easy, because I don’t want to die.
Here’s the thing:
Identifying what I am willing to die for sharpens to a razor edge my awareness of what I am determined to live for.
∾*∾*∾*∾*∾
I believe that it is possible to hold people accountable for their actions while still recognizing our common humanity.
I believe that it is the strength of our relationships with each other that will get us through this time of upheaval.
And I believe that, in its purest and more primal state, Love is stronger than fear.
We can do this.
I am willing to stake my life on it.